header image

Charles Dickens, football manager

What do you get when you combine one of the greatest writers of the Victorian era with Football Manager 2006? I’m glad you asked:

He was always looking for ways to chide me, so I assaulted him with my cane from underneath my sheepskin jacket, to which he welped in delight. He wasn’t fucking right in the head. Thus, we walked into the shit-smelling changing room, and, gathering around what passed for men in the Stanley team, I made a speech, in my usual pleasant and fragrant tones:

“Put them in ovens men, yes we’ll shit on their faces, beat them to crisps and chop them up and bake them.”

They walked out disturbed, but were in the hypnotised frame of mind not to aggravate my temper – they knew me too well, but little did they know I was planning a special holiday at the end of the season, involving knives and Catholic priests in the Amazon rainforest.

Read more Dickensian-inspired footballing. It’s not exactly Great Expectations, but then, what is?

~ by Logan on July 16, 2009.

Comments are closed.